To listen to my son's music without crying? That's a win." A happy childhoodĪccording to his family, Ben Schwartzman and his younger sister, Hayley, had happy childhoods in northwest Indiana.īen graduated from Lake Central High School in 2007 and attended what is now Purdue University Northwest. "If nothing else, that just allows me to feel good. For 14 years, I'd be brokenhearted," Schwartzman said, his voice breaking up as he pushes the words out.
"Now when I hear his music, I feel optimistic. He's hoping for a Grammy, Schwartzman is not ashamed to say, but he'll settle for the feelings Ben's newly released songs give him as he hums along in his car. But he also hopes Ben's story will spread awareness about mental health and suicide prevention.Īll proceeds from the release will go to Centerstone, a nonprofit mental health provider. Schwartzman hopes people enjoy the music. 12, "Falling Star" was released in several-song chunks through streaming services and a new website. 15, the anniversary of Ben's death, and ending Nov. More: Kurt Vonnegut documentary 40 years in the making reveals 'a Hoosier through and through'Īfter 14 years of cold calls and failed celebrity run-ins help from a few of his fellow Hoosiers have given Schwartzman his chance.īeginning on Oct. These lyrics, from Ben's song "Let Me Go," are carved into his tombstone and a park bench in Schererville, where Ben grew up.Īfter Ben died, his father made it a personal mission to share this music - some of the most tangible proof that Ben was here. He recorded songs of angst, of heartbreak, of the metaphysical and the mundane. His parents' marital problems, God and thoughts of self-harm were all probed.
"Because it's just so painful."Īs severe depression and bipolar disorder weighed on his teenage years, Ben took his guitar with him everywhere. "What's funny is I brought a lot of the stuff I have about Ben that I haven't looked at ever," Schwartzman says, as he starts rifling though his bag. It contains many of the physical memories of the 19 years spent on earth by Schwartzman's son, Ben, before Ben died by suicide in 2007.
It doesn't look like much: laminated photo collages, loose papers, weathered pictures of mid-90s youth soccer teams - all featuring the same smiling boy and his brown mop of slightly curled hair. If you or someone you know may be struggling with suicidal thoughts, call the suicide prevention hotline at 80.īLOOMINGTON - On a breezy Monday, Ed Schwartzman plops a bag next to him at the center table of his Bloomington restaurant. This story contains discussion of suicide.